Surprise, surprise! Health care summit much ado about nothing

Suffice it to say that neither the Democrats nor the Republicans were feeling very zippy after yesterday’s seven-hour health care summit.
President Obama was especially gloomy when said he is not sure Democrats can “bridge the gap” with the GOP to reach a compromise on the plan, and he strongly suggested that Democrats will try to pass a sweeping overhaul without GOP support by using controversial Senate budget rules that would disallow filibusters.
Things are getting tighter than a vise, it seems.
Obama then threw down the proverbial gauntlet by observing that this fall’s elections would write the verdict on who was right.
Despite all the lips quivering and Adam’s apples jiggling during that marathon session, both parties might have been more productive if they had spent those seven hours looking for loose change in the sofa or placekicking inanimate objects or concocting cockamamie excuses for wasting everybody’s time.
The showdown did little to change the underlying dynamics of the debate.
The Democrats still are fighting the clock, which has been kicking their butts, to finish health care.
Throw in an uncertain timeline, a legislative path so convoluted it needs a GPS, Obama’s reconciliation attempt boomeranging off both the Republicans and Harry Reid, and health care reform is choking on confusion and conflict.
A Heimlich would seem to be in order.

Allison Baver another shiny product rolling off the Wilson athletic assembly line

They must sprinkle the kids with stardust in the Wilson High hallways.
How else to explain why their athletes grow up to ride currents of destiny and be as dazzling as sapphire?
Whether it’s Olympic medalists Allison Baver (bronze in short-track speedskating 3000-meter relay last night) and Kristy Kowal (silver in the 200-meter breaststroke at Sydney in 2000) or NFL quarterbacks Kerry Collins (Tennessee Titans) and Chad Henne (Miami Dolphins), Wilson grads are fluent in athletics on a world stage.

Once again the global warming geeks shriek that this place is hot while we shovel snow by the sweat of our brows

OK, perhaps in my wrinkled years I suddenly am dumber than a snowplow … but I simply can’t understand this blizzard of global warming doomsday rhetoric.

Please smirk as you read this because while we continue to get buried in a hellish hail of snowstorms, scientists — perhaps frozen out of their minds — continue to claim Mother Earth continues to get hotter than a city guy who just found somebody else’s car parked in the spot he spent 4.75 hours shoveling out.

Do you believe this past January was the hottest January ever and this past November was the hottest November ever? If I live to the twelfth of never, I won’t believe that! And not only that, but supposedly 2000-2009 was the hottest decade of all time.

If things are all so hot around here, why am I not wearing cargo shorts, a “Can You Beat Zeke?” T-shirt and flip-flops today?

Humans are frail vessels and I’m deathly afraid we all will freeze to death as global warming geysers like Yellowstone on steroids.

Don't throw a rod but Obama's mechanics already are gearing up for 2012

Past is prologue.

Barack Obama’s brain trust — trust me, there is a brain or two there if you dig deep enough with a scalpel — is laying the groundwork for 2012.
Hardly a surprise that Obama’s top advisers are privately preparing for the president’s reelection campaign.
After all, most presidents — LBJ being a notable exception because of the quagmire that was Vietnam — have had to have their fingers pried from the White House door.
While Obama’s open road to change has sprouted considerable potholes in the past year or so, his 2008 campaign was an intricately plotted caper.
His 2012 campaign is likely to be run out of Chicago and managed by White House deputy chief of staff Jim Messina, with White House senior adviser David Axelrod reprising his role as Obama’s muse and overseeing the campaign’s tone.
No change there apparently.

Entrepreneur 101: Lingerie model puts on clothes to run one of the world's largest drug gangs using beautiful angels as smugglers

With the economy the way it is, I guess it doesn’t hurt to transition to a different line of work.
Granted, some transitions are more jolting than others.
Perhaps this isn’t quite on the same plane as say a sitting president running away from the White House to become a circus clown, but Angie Sanselmente Valencia apparently punted on being a lingerie model in Colombia and moved to Argentina to become the ringleader of the one of the world’s largest drug gangs.
Valenica, who evidently grew weary of working in her underwear, brought some glamour to the smuggling world — which traditionally has not been pocked with beautiful people. After all, when’s the last time you saw a gorgeous drug dealer in Reading? Like never? The folks caught in drug busts here always seem to be afflicted with some sort of carbuncle/algae/fungus condition.
Authorities said Valencia recruited could-cause-cardiac-arrest-in-a-yak models to transport cocaine from Colombia to Cancun every 24 hours, after which the coke was trafficked to Europe.
Valencia devilishly described her working girls as “unsuspicious, beautiful angels.”
However, all good things — OK, bad things, too — must come to an end. One of the angels was busted at an airport in Buenos Aires with 55 kilograms of coke last month and sang like a canary, er, angel.
Valencia, crowned Colombia’s “Queen of Coffee” in 2000, is thought be on the run in Argentina or Mexico after the scam was blown. Then again, if Reading ever stops having snowstorms, perhaps she could seek sanctuary here.
By the way, if you’re wondering how a gorgeous lingerie model starts her own drug-smuggling operation, it apparently was a matter of the heart. She was dating a notorious Mexican drug lord known as “The Monster” but left him to set up her own empire.
She obviously is entrepreneurial and courageous. Somebody nicknamed “The Monster” likely doesn’t have the demeanor of Mister Rodgers when his girlfriend dumps him and starts taking coke off his plate.
Or maybe he simply figured destiny threw him a left hook right on the kisser.

Eagles jettison Brian Westbrook, a falling star who once was a skyrocket in flight

All is not well in the disposable NFL universe.

The Eagles had to let go of one of their all-time greats today.
They released Brian Westbrook, their brilliant but brittle multi-purpose threat as a runner, receiver and returner.
Indeed when it came to the aforementioned 3 Rs, Westbrook was one of the most feared and dynamic weapons in the league.
But running backs are not built for the long haul. It’s a position that is the property of the young and healthy.
With Westbrook’s eight-year run gradually compromised and diminished by an endless spate of injuries, and the $7.25 million he was due in salary this coming season, the Eagles sadly pulled the welcome mat from under him.
He will be missed. Remarkable as a player and a person, he always had seemed hijacked from a young boy’s dream.

Obama rolls out a health care package so watered down that it should come with a lifeguard

There have been so many proposed versions of health care reform that if you tried to count them all on the digits of the 31 million uninsured Americans, you’d run out of fingers and toes.
The latest pollination of plans came today when President Barack, trying to save his health care overhaul from going totally belly up on the coroner’s table with a big tag on its toe, unveiled (minus the drum roll) a nearly $1 trillion, 10-year compromise that would allow the government to deny or roll back egregious insurance premium increases that make consumers deathly sick with anger.
The latest proposal, although more Republican friendly than before, likely would be DOA in Congress anyway.
But it makes for good White House posturing just days before Obama’s televised health care powwow where he wants Democrats and Republicans to smoke the peace pipe and risk getting lung cancer because all of them, of course, have health care.