Can Boehner get his House in order?

I don’t need drugs because following the debt ceiling debate makes me hallucinate.
The whole mess boggles the mind because I’m not exactly sure just who’s squinting across the line of scrimmage.
Yeah, we got the Dems vs. the GOP. That’s a given. Just like Michael vs. Lucifer, Cain vs. Abel, etc.
But we also got the Republicans vs. the Republicans (specifically the Tea Party people).

Indeed, the Tea Party folks are more ornery than a scorned lover. And more stubborn than a blood stain.
I feel downright sorry for poor ol’ John Boehner.
He’s gonna have to walk on water hazards if he can muster enough votes needed for the House to raise the debt limit and prevent economic convulsions that will have the wallets of Americans spasming like jackhammers.
Boehner is wrestling with alligators as he struggles to lead an unwieldy Republican membership that’s heavily influenced by debt-hating tea partyers. And he will need help from the Democratic minority, dominated by liberals following the 2010 elections, which swept away dozens of moderates.
The House has 240 Republicans. But 38 have signed a pledge to oppose any debt ceiling increase unless it is accompanied by a constitutional amendment to balance the budget, which is politically unachievable.
The Tea Partyers are fueled by a loathing for government, which is snagging the GOP between antigovernment fervor and the need to keep the lights on.
So there sits Boehner between a rock and a hard place.