Obama to dice and mince American Jobs Act so he can shove it piece by piece down gagging Republican throats

You remember President Obama’s American Jobs Act, of course. He addressed Congress on it and even the networks and other media outlets mentioned it. The whole thing had more drama than Broadway, if I recall.

Obama’s speech apparently fell on deaf ears in Congress. The bill sat around getting dusty for a bit, and seemingly suffocated last week in the Senate when only 51 Democrats voted to bring it up for debate and that was rather wimpy in the face of the Republican filibuster.

Even though Americans are screaming for jobs and the left is protesting all across the land, even Reading, as if the 1960s came back to life without the great rock music, Republicans suddenly are against positions of the bill that broad swaths of the party have supported in the past.

The White House built the jobs bill with pieces of legislation that had been previously supported by leading Republicans so that the Obama administration could hammer them with those past votes and statements, making the case that the GOP’s opposition to jobs legislation is rooted in pure politics.

Which, astonishingly, it is.

So frustrated over this that his upper back and neck have more knots than a den of Eagle Scouts and my gym sneaker laces, Obama, with a backdrop of blue sky in these stormy times, said today that “maybe they couldn’t understand the whole thing at once.” So, to do Congress a favor, “we’re going to break it up into bite-sized pieces, so they can take a thoughtful approach.”

About time, Mr. President. What took you so long? Preoccupied with Herman Cain’s 9-9-9 and galvanic personality? People said from Day One that the bill was way too sprawling. If you print it out, you need a nearby oak tree to supply enough paper to replenish your printer. Not to mention going through only-God-knows-how-many print cartridges. Sort of like the Obamacare bill, come to think of it.

Granted, chopping the American Jobs Act up into small bites may facilitate the GOP digestive tract, which seemingly has been paralyzed by indigestion. Still, Obama is gambling that Republicans will be able to then piece it all together like some gigantic puzzle. Don’t hold your breath unless you have your favorite funeral home on speed dial.

In the midst of all the desperate and raucous clamor for jobs, don’t you find all this is rather puzzling, if not downright demoralizing?

Perhaps it’s time to replace our hobbled democratic system with a benevolent, enlightened monarchy. King Herman I strike anyone’s fancy? King Rush I? Queen Rachel I? Or how about King Zeke I? Of course, I wouldn’t want to work weekends during football season.