C'mon, man! Newt Gingrich, the soulmate of evangelicals?

Somebody, I believe it was Vanna White, once said that politics makes for strange bedfellows.
Apparently so. Supposedly evangelicals are flocking toward Newt Gingrich.
Never mind that the former Speaker has scraped fenders with adultery, not to mention bumping into the marital altar three times.
Nevertheless, evangelicals in Iowa seem to be raising a mighty Hallelujah chorus over Gingrich.
Who would have thunk it? There was a time when evangelicals never would let a guy like Newt come into their house and wipe his muddy shoes all over their white shag carpet.

Guess these folks now are like a drowning man clutching at a razor blade. They simply don’t dig Mitt Romney’s shtick because he’s a dreaded Mormon.

So they’re narrowing their focus, like sighting down a rifle barrel. They’re too myopic to see beyond their desperation. So strictly looking through a straw, they see Gingrich as the man lighting the pilot on the blue flame of family values.

Can you imagine? Lord, take me now because I’ve heard it all!

Indeed, there’s Steve Deace, an influential conservative radio show host who says of Gingrich (and I’m not making this up, trust me):

“I see a lot of parallels between King David and Newt Gingrich, two extraordinary men gifted by God, whose lives include very high highs and very low lows.”

David and Newt coupled in the same sentence? Now there is a leap of faith!

For you non-Biblical scholars out there, David committed adultery with Bathsheba, who reportedly was hot enough to cause cardiac arrest in a camel, then had her husband killed.

The logic, I guess, is that if the Bible can make room for a morally flawed hero like David, Christian conservatives can make room for Newt. All the while praying that Gingrich can slingshot a rock at Romney and then at Barack Obama.

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