Bird Brains didn't deserve a playoff spot, even in the depleted NFC East

Writing an obit never is as much fun as drinking mai tais while watching a spectacular sunset at Waikiki Beach.
Especially on Christmas Day.
Speaking of Christmas, Mele Kalikimaka everybody.
Now back to the walking dead. Your Philadelphia Eagles.
The Birds are cooked. Stick a fork in them. No playoffs for them.
Asking why is dumber than asking your wife why she’s putting on weight.
The answers are obvious. In fact, you don’t even have to dig into the hard earth for those slimy creatures we call facts.
First, they screwed up the personnel acquisition. They burned through millions signing the wrong guys but stubbornly neglected DeSean Jackson.
The Dream Team moniker was a sham. But it was an omen for disaster. The more intense the situation, the more unforeseeable the denouement. In early September, nobody saw this season unraveling and unspooling into failure.
They locked up the wrong quarterback. Michael Vick can be theatrically entertaining and dramatic. But he’s inconsistent, injury-prone, and needs Braille to read defenses.
Andy Reid was an idiot to make Juan Castillo his defensive coordinator. From Day One, Castillo was utterly clueless in designing the D’s tectonic plates. No wonder that defense quickly became a tinderbox in too many games.
They viewed linebackers as inconsequential, as disposable as napkins and as essential as space heaters in an inferno.
An epidemic of turnovers where the football resembled a boomerang and a rash of bonehead penalties where more hankies were dropped than in North Korea when Dear Leader morphed into Dead Leader.
Of course, if figures the Eagles now are teasing us with a late, meaningless rush of success.
Ignore the talk about building momentum for next year. That never, ever happens in the NFL because teams change players more frequently than runway models change outfits.
Nevertheless, Andy Reid, who has outworn his welcome, will return. It’s as inevitable as tonight’s sunset. Which won’t be that beautiful in Philly.

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