Keep the vest on, Rick Santorum!

A snappy suit and tie can dress up even a slob. Which is why the fashion industry has a bottom line that has the looks of GQ quality.

Rick Santorum is no slob. You don’t have to butter him to squeeze him through doorways. He doesn’t drip flesh like gravy. He doesn’t have more chins than a Chinese phone book.

He hardly is as porcine as Newt Gingrich.

And he looks like a minnow docked next to the whale that is Chris Christie.

Still, Santorum doesn’t pack a six-pack.

If he wants to punch Romney in the gut, my advice to Rick is to stay away from the pool.

He’s no Moby Dick, but those aren’t great abs basking poolside in Puerto Rico.

Indeed, Santorum is fortunate that the ever pesky Captain Ahab didn’t harpoon him.

Just saying that Santorum should be a tad more conservative in his eating habits and let the porky Democrats be a little more liberal when ordering from the menu.

Then again, the GOP is the elephant party.

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