OK, Chip Kelly actually DOES play frenetic football.
Faster than a hiccup. Faster than a blink. Faster than a speeding bullet. Faster than the speed of light. Faster than you know what through a goose after a trip to Taco Bell. Faster than Obama’s descent from divinity.
The Eagles were faster than Usain Bolt in the first half en route to an astonishing 33-27 win over a rusty RGIII and the Washington Redskins at FedEx Field Monday night.
Hell, the Birds were even faster than FedEx.
Michael Vick and Shady McCoy were playing pinball football to great success and the only question now is who will get exhausted first — the Eagles, their opponents or the fans?
Let’s all toast Chip and the Eagles with an energy drink tonight. And fasten our seat belts.