Some folks have the most redeemable, adorable qualities. They restore your faith in the human condition.
Then there are people like Cavan McDaniel, who likely won’t be named Humanitarian of the Year.
Cops in Florida say McDaniel assaulted a convenience store attendant with a barrage of hot dogs.
God, I hope she’s not a vegan.
According to a police statement on the arrest, witnesses told deputies that McDaniel was upset because the attendant would not sell him beer.
The victim then told deputies that McDaniel threw hot dogs at her and poked her in the face with a corn dog stick, leaving a red mark under an eye.
Another black eye for mankind.
Live long enough and you’re liable to see the improbable, hell, impossible become reality.
The last time the Philadelphia Eagles won a world championship I was 11 and listened to them beat the Vince Lombardi Green Bay Packers on the radio because the 1960 NFL title game was blacked out in Philly.
Then came Sunday night’s spectacularly astonishing 41-33 Eagles’ Super Bowl victory over the New England Patriots when both offenses were electrifying and both defenses rested their case.
This time there was no incredible Patriots’ comeback. This time QB12, also known as Tom Brady the G.O.A.T., didn’t pull it out with a miracle. Despite throwing for an incredible 505 yards, his Hail Mary went unanswered as his 60-yard heave on the final play bounced off a bunch of hands and onto the Patriots’ logo in the end zone.
The Eagles were champions of the world for the first time in 58 years.
Eagles coach Doug Pederson, a swashbuckling gambler who has evolved into a master play caller, outwitted The Hoodie. And Nick Foles was dropping dimes with aplomb and throwing deep with uncanny accuracy.
Tom may be beating Time but he couldn’t beat the Eagles.
For Philly was a team of destiny. And you can’t screw with destiny.